TheBleghHousewife

I walked into the indoor play area, sat down and ordered myself a milkshake while I encouraged my little man to go and play. My friend,who I was supposed to meet, couldn't make it because kids, pregnancy and life, so I decided to make the best of it and just hang out with my little guy and play with him. It took him a while to warm up to the situation and overall setting, but once he did he just wanted to play, and play and play! He spotted two little girls roughly the same age as him and he immediately made a beeline towards them (we're talking about 1 year olds here). I followed him cautiously, trying not to be a helicopter mom, but also wanting to make sure that they played nice. By the time he got there, the moms of these two little girls went quiet. I asked how old the girls were, I tried to make small talk as our kids started to get closer to one another, and before they were in touching distance these moms stood up and swooped their children away from my son and m...

Sigh. This is such an easy trap to fall into. You meet up with some of your mom friends and notice that their little one's may be able to do something that your little one can't. And there it is. Such a minuscule thing, and yet it affects you (or at least me). "Am I not stimulating him enough?" "Why is he behind?" "How do I get him to do that specific thing?" "Why isn't he crawling?" And so the self doubt goes on, and simultaneously you (often unintentionally) become a competitive mom. It doesn't have to be innately stressed or said, but it's the internal turmoil that notifies you that yes, you may be going slightly crazy. I mean, at the end of the day what does it matter? Children develop at different rates. They acquire different skill sets, and because they are individuals, these skill sets may differ in terms of what they choose to conquer first. So while my little one is not able to do X yet, he's able t...

The Deets: So this is a regular hangout spot for me because a) the coffee is GOOD and b) it’s got a really great vibe. Find it at 24A Riley Road, Bedfordview:            Open 8.00am – 5.00pm (Tues – Thurs)                                                                                             8:00am – 8:00pm (Fri & Sat)                           ...

So I've back and forthed on this one for a while: What is the best age gap between children? I think the reason I'm so hung up on this is because while I want a second child I don't want it to affect my son negatively. That sweet, cuddly nature of his - will it change? The way he grabs my hand and marches me around the house to show me things. The way he's discovering his independence. At the end of the day, I don't want him to feel less. Less wanted. Less loved. Less independent. Receiving less attention. Just less. The other side of the coin is that I think he'd really like having a sibling. How beautiful will it be to see him as a big brother? Will his nurturing nature translate well into big brother status? Will he share all of his newfound independence, encouraging a little soul to get up to no good with him? And then, if this is all to be true (and believed), then what is the best age gap between children? And so I go back and forth. Breastfeed...

It's been storming on and off in Joburg this past week, which has made getting out the house with a baby a tad impossible. Being home confined hasn't been all bad, and in truth it got me thinking: what makes a childhood? Now the obvious answer here is a child. Yes, I suppose a child is imperative to having a childhood, but I mean what makes a childhood good? How do you create those awesome childhood memories? The memories that forge friendships and have you talking about them way into adulthood. I have been so focussed on going out to create great playdates, to let me son have wonderful experiences and explore new places, that somewhere along the line I have forgotten that fun happens at home too. And so, on these rainy days I've been thinking that maybe we place too much emphasis on going out and not enough emphasis on making the ordinary fun. These memories that we're creating need to start at home - from running in garden to baking in the kitchen, to even build...

"He's so cute! How old is he?" She asks me as I try to seem casual as I get up to collect my crawling infant across the doctor's rooms for the umpteenth time. I smile, "Nearly eleven months". At this moment my son turns his head, bats his baby blues and starts opening and closing his mouth like a fish, and finishes it off with a giggle. "He's hungry," an older woman protests, "You need to give him his bottle," I smile and say that he's not hungry and is just playing. "Besides I don't have a bottle, I'm the milk," I say. "Still?" Rewind a few months: I'm carrying my son whilst walking through a shopping mall. An elderly woman seems to be making a beeline straight for me, and I'm quite surprised at how agile she is at navigating the crowds to get to me. Once she's within a close enough distance she yells, "You!" Pointing her finger in my direction, I double check to see if it is...

Weight. Let that word sink in. Now, as a society we're obsessed with it. How much did you lose? How much do you weigh? How many cm is your waist line? What is your goal weight? We are bombarded with this issue centring on weight. As a woman, you have to be living under a rock not to notice. Two weeks after giving birth I stood in front of a full length mirror with my shirt hiked up, looking at my mid-riff and wondering when and if I would get my pre-baby body back. But then the word weight took a very different turn in my motherhood journey. Was my newborn gaining enough weight? We breastfed (and are still breastfeeding) and my son was a month prem, so weight gain became a topical issue. Looking back to those first crazy 6 weeks of dealing with a newborn, I tried to enjoy my little bundle of joy. I tried to settled in. I tried to find my stride. But the underlying issue was ALWAYS weight gain. We went for weigh-in's religiously. I expressed milk to make sure ...

Motherhood is scary. Motherhood in South Africa can be terrifying. Now, ain't that the truth. I adore my little man with my whole heart, but in many ways having him has made me an easy target when it comes to crime. Mom's are easy targets. It's that simple. I mean when it comes down to it, your focus and attention is on your child(ren). Here's a simple example: The other day I was in a grocery store, I had my little munchkin sitting in the chair part of the trolley/shopping cart (with a cart cover - he's loving this experience, I might add). At the end of my manic shopping spree (because I know that he's only going to be calm, relaxed and giggly for so long before he loses his mind and wants to be picked up). I followed the snake-like queue waiting patiently to reach the front and be called to a check-out counter. The entire time I was moving slowly with the queue I was singing and playing with my baby in order to keep him distracted, two women (what ap...

Parenthood. Wow, wasn't I ready. I mean really, I was not ready. But, in hindsight how could I have been? My son made his debut into this world, one month early via emergency C-section. So yes, practically I wasn't ready. The nursery wasn't done, the main cot hadn't been delivered, a bunch of things still needed to be bought. Didn't I need all of the things? The gadgets? More blankets? You can never have enough blankets right?! So, despite not being practically ready, I had all these illusions about parenthood and what I would do. Here's five things I had illusions about and how they actually turned out. 1. I wouldn't co-sleep with my baby. In fact, I read all the SIDS articles on how this could be detrimental to your child - so why would I risk it? In fact, I felt so strongly about this that I ended up getting not just one cot, but two! One for the nursery (naturally) and a special co-sleeper for our bedroom. So because my son was born early, I was ...